Lukerpig.com - One of the four pillars of the internet
Volcano Bill is so upper-crust that even his yacht owns a yacht
This would be funny if I weren't so illiterate
Mel doesn't even know what infraorder his species belongs to!
OSHA called and they want your kneecaps back
The difference between sonar and radar is that my son is rad
I feel like I just gave birth to a carwash
How can I be all smiles when my internal organs don't have teeth?
THIS JUST IN: Wouldn't it be cool if squirrles wore little sweater vests
Click here for that classic heart-sinking feeling
I tried to buy some order but they were all out of control
This is very helpful
He is strum kind of wonderful
My learning style is being told the right answer
Learning how to receive is a gift that keeps on giving
IMAGINE IF CARS RAN ON COFFEE INSTEAD OF LEAD
It's amazing what you can accomplish when I get all the credit
I've had a lot of people tell me that this artwork inspired them to succeed
My inner child's braincase hasn't fused yet
After a long hard day, nothing helps me relax quite like eating a spoonful of peas
To the victors go the spoiled goods
I've been traininig my body so hard it's beginning to "choo choo"
My uncle is a sassafras tree
I didn't learn to crawl until I was 6
I died the way I lived: Vicariously
Finally my favorite holiday
You are being spoonfed lies by the media. *I* am being spoonfed baby food because I am a baby
I can do between two and three billion pushups
big yip to all my homedawgs
If the rules are written by the victors, then who writes the victors?
The only realignment I need is realignment surgery
AW HAW NAW: HE SLAMPIN IT DOWN THA HIZOOP
hubba hubba telly tubba
:V - So busy going I forgot where I was coming
When they go low, I declare opposite day and then I go even lower
look in the mirror: if all you see is a mirror then you are a mirror
I only date boys who are 1000000000 feet tall
I dig when my mom tells me about my fingers
Not all heroes are guilty of wearing capes
There's no explanation: it's pretty clear
Please stop yelling I'm already dead
Showing up is half the battle. The other half is battling.
INTRODUCING: THE CRACKINATOR
SPEAK DOWN SONNY
I am capable of planking for hours
I only have eyes for dessert drank
It's like a combination of LARPing and GLAMPing
If I say things slowly enough then it will take me 100 years to say it
I am within a one-mile radius of Africa
My mean strings are fueled by beans
CURRENT MOOD: MOODY
Did you know that pangolins are the only animal capable of capitalization?
I aim to serve
I'm so lonley because all of my friends evolved into chimpanzees
A diet made of corn can actually
www dot dub dot www com corn
No seriously I am 🤣🤣🤣 rn my sides hurt so bad
Yo fam this right here is 💯 💯 💯 💯 it is my jam know what I'm saying?
I'm slowly losing all of my liquids but luckily I still have some
YO TENGO MUCHO TEMOR
when I grow up I want to be a matchbook
modern science can't explain how I remain so fly all the time
Briaoceros does what few dare to dream
you are a but giggle in a house full of farts
6 feet deep breaths
I have inferior blastopores
how can I tell your secrets when I can't even tell the time
Nothin personal, kid
My skull could be your nest if you play your cards right
You have just been sponged
I don't fit in my chair because it is only 3 microns large
Don't click if you don't like a c t i o n
It's Tim-2-Go
The only thing left to do is to start
Holes are evolving into something far worse
I dunno, maybe spuds?
Cliffs scare me because they are so beautiful
I'm sorry Steve, sometimes I make the rules
this made more sense without context
![My favorite color is [REDACTED]](/paint/miik.png){kind=link}
My favorite color is [REDACTED]
DOES ANYBODY KNOW KUNG FU ANYMORE???
My horcrux is the entire world's supply of banana pudding
I insist that you leave your mortal enemy my postal stamps
DANGER LURKS
As it turns out, Janky Hanky Kong is only four years old
I believe it's butter
WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF
That guy over there is such an alumbnuts
DARRYL, GET OUT OF MY TRAP DOOR
Excuse me but I'm the star here
Oh god here comes Mr. Bigmouth I hope he doesn't have any more treats
Sometimes people tell me I'm too gentle
Please tell this tree to go breathe somewhere else
What time is it in goat years?
If it weren't for cheating I'd never be able to lose
I'm a jack of all trades, master of all humans
Check out this sweet Mario Maker level
Appropriate flex, bro
There's a hole in my heart where my brain once lived
Just kidding I charge a fee for my renaming service
I will rename you for free
NO SKATES NO SERVICE
Never give up unless it's too hard
The hardest puzzle is made out of diamond
It's time for the global scale
There is no explanation for how this works
Oh look at me I'm so smart because I KNOW HOW TO HOLD A PEN
I can't believe they used to torch their strawberries in the past
Will the real William Shatner please recognize this dog's fortitude?
Please save your accordion for the after-party
STAMPEDE!
And then there were tweenagers bearing their souls
SMELL THIS GEEZE BALL
Gangship is second only to friendship
Cool, I just finished doing all your losing for you
I'm just bitter of those who aren't my forefathers
Stop crying before I force myself to cry to fit in
Kongrats on that promotion
For the record, I can rotate my own eyes
I ingested homeless cooking and now I'm 8' tall
Time to look awful for my cool friends
I just call it like I see it
Just tell me how ferocious I truly am
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
Desperate times call me on my smart phone
Brugh do you even leftist heap?
The mailman ate my letter because he said it was full of nutrients
My oingos are full of boingos
I'm so tired of dying alone :(
My wacky sound effects make children giggle
Please please please please please knock me out
By the power of Mr. Larry, I shall will myself to conformity
Sticks and stones break my promises
No thanks, I'm already going to the moon
HOO CHA
But sir, what about the bidness on aisle 3?
I'm so uncrustable
Have you considered not hanging out with your hands?
There are tens of us who understand how to count to 3
Please tell me you didn't take my favorite cube!
When ya boi is all netflix and no chill
Did you know lions are within striking distance?
You can play the trumpet right now.
Rumble in the Blungle.
I'm tired of the good old days.
Don't forget to leave a like, retweet, comment, subscribe, pay me, look at me, acknowledge me, and thumbs me up. Thanks
I learned how to win when I was a tiger in the mountains.
Are we hating fun yet?
Ashes to ashes.
I love the bleach boyz.
MFW all of my friends are all hanging out without me and won't tell me where they are.
My left or your right?
My shirt is actually photons.
My guitar sounds like compressed air.
I can't keep quiet if this air is made of freeon.
My friends say my flavor isn't bold enough.
Who do I have to bribe to make some gosh darned money?
Yesteray I was free, but today I am enraged.
I'm only 12 years old.
Zip Zap Zip Zap Rap.
Boogieing just isn't the same in overalls.
Get this scooob out of my doo
You can chant but can you holler?
There aren't any leftovers to laugh at.
I'm serious about family bonding.
I can't get enough ribcages.
Every day is PIZZA DINNER NIGHT!
My past tense is your future tense.
Como se dice corbata en Espanol?
Superman is both bird and plane.
My beard is starting to hitch.
I'M ILLEGITIMATELY SCARED
Do I love you or do I love money?
Jesus is more perfect than my speling.
I'm powered by extreme fruit flavor.
I CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE BLINKING.
I'm neither alert nor focused.
Say no to peppercorns.
As a Christmas present for all the nice children, I give you the lukerpig.com Archives!
Never forget that I'm made of atoms
Depicted: My Favorite Dead Dictator
#LOLLOLLOLOL
Won't You Come
Oh yeah, I have over 13 gods!
It's sure to stun you
Can you imagine such a fate?
Follow lukerpig.com on Twitter!
I can't eat when I'm upset :(
Birds of a whatever, flock together.
Don't call it a Comebackbackbackbackbackback
Please don't get too upset
KNOCK KNOCK!
WHO'S THERE?
Follow lukerpig.com on Facebook!
But Z?
Candy and Spice make me NICE!
Free Our Souls From Fritos
Splendor and Ruckus... ahoy
I'm going foreward
I'm going backward
George Michael ain't nothing to mess with
Would I ever be so bold?
Never Warp through time
Up Up And Away :(
Don't know, don't hesitate to destroy!
Lemons taste like sugar!
When's the last time you asked yourself the hard questions?
My my, Miss American Spliggit
Don't wait til you're done reading this sentence to click this link.
Don't huff too much glue, now!
Why Ford. Why Now.
Who hasn't heard of The Candy Man?
Girls like Larry because he doesn't play by the rules
Is that a big pile of Zoot Canoes?
Have you ever wondered about the consequences?
Do click this link if you like EXPLOSIONS
Don't click this link if you hate having fun
They hate you, you're a vegetable
Nobdy does it half as good as you
Does anybody else feel a bit queezee?
Good lord, is that a hamster or a donkey?
You have some nerve, mister!
Smile, it's your lucky day!
Jenkies!
Today is the day we all die a little more :)
Don't let him get away with it!
THIS LINK FOR PREMIUM MEMBERS ONLY
DeeDeeDeeDeeDeeDee
Yrotsed Him!
He sees you when you're sleeping...
BOOM, all the sudden DJ hits you with a surprise left!
Destruction Mode: Terminate
The newest specimen to the Brett Hull Zoo!
Never knew the world was so round, did you? DID YOU?
No hurry, Exxon!
One in the sink, two in the think.
Perhaps the author should get a billion astro-dollars?
Don't get caught without one!
Scurvey Dogg doesn't take kindly to your no-nonsense attitude
They went on to get married and had three beautiful children before he left her for a blender
The plight of those with four tearducts
PUT YOUR RAISINS BACK IN YOUR FOOD
Knuckle Farming was a popular recreational activity during the Great Depression
Don't look now, but I'm not wearing any overalls
Houston, we have a slight problem. We lost our astrojacks
DJ hopes you feel FANTASTIC
Before There Was DVDasaurus...
I'm Magically Delicious
Feast Your Eyes Upon THAT!
It's like we're backtracking to yesterdimension
Have yourself a lick of beer pudding
I have your spare tractor
Take your Sludge Back. We only accpet MasterCard.
Do You Have Stairs?
I AM THE GREATEST
Will you be his neighbor?
I pity your armpits
UP UP UP! cuz we're DOWN DOWN DOWN!
Stuff By DJ and Paint Faces by me!
Smile! You're on TELEMUNDO!
He has come
Steven Hawkings has the Bongos
A "mature" rendition of Three Blind Mice
Bow to your new leader
SHOCKING NEWS FROM NINTENDO THAT'S REAL
You won't like me when I'm Fergalicious.
AND THE ANGELS SANG!
Spooktacular!
One in the hand is worth nothing to Bush
Where is your God now?
Fo Shizzlez!
It's time to FEEL GOOD!
Nice To Meet You!
One Size Fits All hyperspheres!
CHOMP!
¿Cómo se dice "Zebra" en español?.
Come, let us adore him.
It's the inside that counts.
Supersoak that hoe.
Cocaine is a powerful drug.
Go America!!
WHO YOU GONNA CALL?!
That's NO GOOD!
GOBBLE GOBBLE!
Thousands of years of artistic evolution has lead us to this point.
This is the wonderment-amazement bar.
A Grab-bag of FUN!
George Bush flipping us the bird!
Woah, Ostrich!
America's favorite Man-Turkey!
SCGified Stuff!
Bad Jpgs!
Lukerpig lives.
I Love Jimmy Wales!
Crazy Tony Blair Cartoon!
People say I update too much
Wow, my computer broke, and I haven't been able to update until today
She's got nothing on Elvis
Guesssssssssssssss who!
Yay! I'm king of the mountain!
Nobody's stopping the Halligash.
Nothing beats Mr. Angus Mobility
Do not be afraid, they are amoung us.
Scribbles McCribbles!
Now Now, one at a time!
He is the master, you are the learner.
Sorry, guys... I was unable to update my website!!
Gary Busey wants to wish you a HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!
Annoy rhymes with Enjoy!
I'm so so so so so so so so so so so so sorry that I didn't update yesterday! Hurricane Wilma KILLED my website!!! worse yet, it nearly killed me, too. That's why I have no real update today
Abe Lincoln wasn't as stinkin' as this man's thinking!
I'm not lying this time, I actually made an update!
OMG OMG OMG! NEW BRETT HULL well, not really
You Gellin'?
LAWL! IT'S LARRY KING!
To celebrate my return, you get a new midi!
Here's a hefty heeping helping of one week's worth of updates
When it comes to classy, this man is sassy
dont throw skeletons against windows because eating shards of glass can kill you
Remember that little update I made on September first? I lied.
There's a snake in my boots
OMG THERE'S A HOLE IN THE OZONE LAYER!!
Thames Burkley is a DINOSAUR
I'dlike to plead the fiith
I'm looking at you, NOVICE
You've been HOLY SMOKED!!
I like the nightlife
Just when you thought he couldn't get hawter...
Look at me, I'm a Chobbernox!
A promise broken is a promise earned
Lo-Jax
Not to be mean, or anything, but...
Guess what I was for Halloweeeeeeen
WHY NOT START OFF SEPTEMBER WITH A NEW LAYOUT? ("classic" lukerpig.com update made 2 years ago today. Oh, by the way, lukerpig.com promises at least a text-update every day for the month of september, or your money back!)
In maintaining lukerpig.com standards, I just Norwegian...
Darling, you look stunning!
OMG, I'm so wonderful
I've gotten too lazy for my own good...
Oh noez! The Benedict is getting away!!!
Sorry, I was wastin' away again in margaritaville Also, I have RSS feed... FOR REAL!!!
To celebrate the changitation of my logo, I'll give you WARICHU!... props to DJ
To celebrate the fixitation of the jpgations, I'll give you THIS MIDI!
All the pictures in FireFox work now! Thank you lukerpig for showing me how to fix it!
For some reason, all the picutres I post aren't working in FireFox, and I don't know why!!!
It's been 4 days. I must have a good update. Right? WRONG! enjoy your crappy update
DUN DUN DE-DUN!. I'm removing support for top-site city. This move will cut up to 9 seconds off the total lukerpig.com loading time. hooray hooray hooray!
It's never to late to outshine Mr.Pockets Said this picture that took DJ 3 hours to make
Never to be not-awesome, DJ made me some more critters... and I'll add one a day every day I update until I run out. YESSSSSSS....
Just when I was losing faith in all that was awesome, katakoon and Riot GM show'd me wasup
Not as cool as Pepper Anne, but much cooler then Pepper Anne nonetheless
Don't ask... because I won't tell, but I placed a hard-core ad to my hard-core site. Check it out
In the wake of the collapse of lukerpig.com, there are no survivors
I am a slayer of dragons
wow, it's like I was never gone at some design camp!!!!!!
Since I'm going to be really busy from now until next Saturday, I will leave you with one HUGE, kickass update
Please don't forget the good ol' days
click here for the interweb of hate
click here for a new way to listen to midis! I also fixed yesterday's update
here are more indecipherable drawings of politicians....
from me to you
I have no clue what these are, but I made one anyway for grins. And let me tell you, I've never been grinnier in my life :D... I also switched back to bigger text (for now)
WOW! three updates for today! thank-yay, DJ, ok? He made em'...
Wow. Let me say, Star Wars III was DEFINATLY worth the near-death experience I had waiting for tickets! Better yet, I've lost 40 pounds! lukerpig.com is going to support RSS! To learn more, click on the official lukerpig.com RSS button feed thing! CLICK FOR MORE!
In a dog-eat-dog world, only the strongest survive. I have gone three days without any food, sleep, and a very minimal amount of water as I wait in line for the release in starwars. All around me I hear children screaming in agony, grown men bawling like a baby, and people of all kinds being carried away in stretchers, all in a vein attempt to be some of the first people to see Starwars episode III. I must say I'm impressed by my endurance, I can almost smell that popcorn now, Drink that Coke, and feel the AC for the first time in days. Only 12 more hours... only 12
Ich Bin Ein lukepig... I'm incredibly kickass ready for Starwars episode III to come out! The group in front of me has starven to death, so I will be the first person to get tickets to the next starwars! I'm going to rent out the entire theatre, meaning that I will be the only person in watching the movie! I love being richer then you are.
I'm sorry, another text update. You see, I'm currently in line at the movie theater to see the third starwars! I've been there since yesterday at noon, and I definatly will be one of the first to see it! I really have to go to the bathroom, but the second I leave my Air Conditioned tent some geeks will steal it from me! I'm also getting pretty hungry, and I haven't slept in a week thinking about this movie!!! Hopefully, starwars will be enough of a reason for me to live until the end of the year... And also, don't ask for me to give you a bootleg, however... you're going to have to earn it!
Hydro Princess
Thank you DJ for making, yes making, this for me... this guy is cool (I'm talking about the guy in the picture, not DJ... well, DJ can be OK too)
A Tony Blair cartoon so extreme, I hope even the English can't recognize it...
dedicated to: all those girlfriends out there (you know who you are)
MAY DAY! MAY DAY! get it? it's a pun. You see, today is a holiday called "may day"... but it's also shouted by air plane pilots if they are about to crash... double meanings are SOOO fun!
yay! now you don't have to squint as hard to read the links
don't say nope to THIS pope
It's over... the host switch has been made... we did all we could, and we couldn't save him... JUST PLAYIN'! LOLOL... It's great to be back
caution: impared moter skills
Good job Ripplehost on their great tech support(ha ha ha)... since my host was down for a few days, I'm sure you missed out on your lukerpig.com fix, so, I will give you a 3X AS AWSOME UPDATE!!!
this is a lukerpig.com public announcement
amazingly enough, I had to correct this link before, and got it wrong again! click here to finally see what TCN brought to the lukerpig community....
Well, It's been forever and 2 days since I last updated... but lets keep that our little secret
click here for cuuuuuutttteeee!
THIS JUST IN: Lukerpig.com has been proclaimed the coolest website in the world by the AP, CNN, CIA, FBI, New Mexico, UN, and Heinz, citing that "the elements in lukerpig.com combine to make it the most flavorful, boastful, coolful, and beautiful website created by man, woman, or beast." OH EM GEE! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU FELL FOR THAT!!!!11 APRIL FOOLS! HAR HAR HAR HAR HAR!!!!
looks like SOMEONE'S been sitting on too many walls
Click here for a mind-boggling riddle
HAPPY SECOND BIRTHDAY LUKERPIG.COM! WHILE YAHOO GIVES OUT ICE CREAM ON THEIR BIRTHDAY, I TAKE THE TRADITIONAL APPROACH AND GREATFULLY ACCEPT BIRTHDAY GIFTS. OVER THE LAST TWO YEARS, THE LUKERPIG ENTERPRISE HAS TURNED FROM A ZERO TO A MODERN DAY HERO. AROUND DURRING MEMOGATE, THE INVASION OF IRAQ, AND SUBSERVIENT CHICKEN, ONLY A FOOL WOULD NOT BELIEVE LUKERPIG.COM HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT.... SO WE'RE ALL FOOLS.
AND THEY SAID IT'D NEVER MAKE IT.... WELL, THEY NEVER SAID ANYTHING AND THEY STILL DON'T BECAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW IT EXISTS...
Well well well, Paint Charactures! And everyone thank DJ for yesterday's update... OR ELSE
From me to you, happy easter
well, here we are, stuck in a boat
my update times have fuzzy math
click here if you love me... and DJ loves you too, as he made this
click here to learn a secret
I don't get it. I just don't get it...
Don't become like Mr.Tweed
Click here if you are king of the jungle, and I have no one but me to thank for this
Ouch. The doc (Dr.HTML) showed me several updates that had bad links over the last few weeks. So, since I know you missed them SOO much, I decided to give them the, well, "correct" link...
are you a stealth bomber or a heeemannn? DJ would like to know... since he photographized todays updates...
click here for a... remix of a song you've NEVER heard of before... made by VenomS124, produced and managed by lukerpig.com, the world wide leader in sports
click here if you think I'm pretty, click here if you think I'm not.... thanks to DJ for the second one, and for the bunny itself
well, kat's out of the bag... darn, i went out of order in haste
Don't cry, little sandra, Katakoon has something special for you... thanks kat!
Click here to see a very special guest-starring from you-know-who/what/where/when/how/why (questions: the anti-drug)
Something I did! I bet you are all smiling on the inside
HEY, ENGLAND! Did you know that the color of your neighbor's armor is my favorite? how kind of you to ask... and kind of VenomS124 for giving me another day I don't have to make anything for my site
In the wild world of the internet, you need to be careful! If you are me, those rules don't apply. Thank you for The Cuban Ninja for this lukerpig update... have a cookie
Major, Kick-ass layout change today... at the top of the index page is a random inspirational quote! Live your day by helping others!
when it comes to makin' midi's you know I'm itty bitty!
wow wow PPH
Sorry for the delay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:-(!!!!!!!!!!:-P!!!!!!!!!!!:-*!!!!!!!!!:-%
I'm not anti-american or anything, but do you know which is part of your body does functions guilt feeling?
since I've bored all of you to death, I updated my favorite section, HERE!
Layout change... I got rid of the buttons to pages I don't update any more... one of them your favorite? The first button that says "all lukerpig.com pages" has the removed links... and I will bring the page back If I ever feel like updating one of those pages enough... but I chose my favorites and put them here...
sorry lukerpig.com elite (you know who you are), yet another repeat yet its updated, just like yesterdays... DON'T CLICK HERE *sigh... too bad IE doesn't run like it used ta'
we all get lazy, but I get lazier yet! I'm going to shorten the links by using this today!
hey hey hey... sorry for the delay. looks like lukerpig.com is up today! so go here and don't delay... or you'll be in dismay, ok?
oh, and go here to learn, please
lukerpig, now your "wake up" morning station!
go go gadget soap box
get ready to kick ass and take names
well, your buddy, uncle lukerpig, has recovered from a nasty flu, so instead of put up an update, i'm going to use an image that some have already seen before AGAIN! now thats what I call using your resources in a disiplined manner, if you ask my accountant, heh heh
I'm a crazy lazy daisy
patriot or eagle, click here for a special superbow-sunday lukerpig.com update
this man has candy for a middle name...
what's that crazy oreck man up to now?
TWO WHOLE THINGS TODAY? Yes, and none of them mine. first, a kickass song and two, all gore doin' that hot thing he does
click here if you are chopping onions
I traded in my sense of sound for gaydar.
Lukerpig.com... on the front page of google's image search for "ssbm" and "pwnd"... I'M TAKING OVER THE INTERNET 1 PERSON AT A TIME, EVEN AS IT DOUBLES EVERY 6 MONTHS...and go here while you wait
click here for class, baby...
click here if you are strong like bull
When in doubt, dont take the skeletons head and slam it against the window because that may be very messy and eating shards of glass can kill you
Join the lukerpig.com communities today!
Welcome to tool time!
I figured the banner would be a good place to put people who are big in the news for doing something stupid... so, naturally, the banner honor goes to Prince Harry, who had his own "wardrobe malfunction"
bring it on... dead OR alive.... also... is he doing his job, then?
I don't carry enough sand, Mr. Bustin' Knobs...
this image is bad for those who aren't bad
NO SILLY, TRICKS ARE FOR SLICK WILLIE!
What is Prince Harry doing now that's enraging everyone across the globe?
enjoy the new layout... unless I decide I don't like it then switch it back. If that's the case, you won't enjoy this fancy, hot, new layout... Know what I mean, Jelly Bean?
Not much, but check out this pimpin' new logo thing I made for the site. Its a stick figure, confused, trapped in a box. It represents most readers feelings about this site, and, best of all, it's wordless and can be resized to many different sizes... HOORAY.
sorry, Mr. Loser
don't click if your'e an anti-not non dentist
Down through the village, with a thermos in his hand...
lukerpig.com thongs... proudly made in the USA!
where were you, mrs. kazoo?
proof of concept. 2 years ago today marks the birth of my first ever website, a horrid angelfire site created by html goon and long time associate. little did we know that in 2 years time, the orange and blue frams would be replaced with giant black text on a white background to mark the second anniversary of my cruddy internet portal. We also didn't know that just a day before the anniverserary, that i'd still have a site, a domain name, and it's layout would be so incredibly good no one can resist not not liking it! While it may not be growing fast at all, i'd like to thank the namless long time associate, because if it weren't for him, you wouldn't be reading this filth right now.
coincidence.. or just a broken gopher?
Don't forget to join here at 11pm for the largest bash you'll ever find on lukerpig.com in the end of December 2004... so there
2 DAYS UNTIL THE OFFICIAL LUKERPIG.COM NEW YEAR'S BASH... COME ON BETWEEN 11PM AND MIDNIGHT TO WITNESS MAGIC
deja vu all over again
darn broken, rumorful internets... badabing
'twas the night before christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even these things....
I'm going to be on vacation all next week, so here's your week's worth of updates!
welcome our new lukerpig.com scrolling affiliate... discreteautos... a clasified car site! I love having no theme here... but I also made this page
lukerpig.com... proudly displayed as one of the most pathetic websites on flushtheweb.com... and MORE OF THE SAME! W00T!
Can you believe was one year ago?
terrible things happen when you are on the computer late at night
the sneeches from mars have stars upon thars
OMAGAWH LEAPING BABIES
click here if you don't like LAW's Victor Anthony's head plastered onto peoples bodies
Do you hate spongebob? here is a reason that might just change your mind
Bagpuss Day Dream This ever inspiring poster, if you buy it this christmas season, can proudly be displayed wherever you need a bit of cheer... because this poster will deplete the cheer even more because its so weird...
click here to be learned
Muppet Babies Toyland Train- This charming book centers around the muppet babies, which, in more down to earth terms, are the muppets as babies. This book, while seemingly made for kids, is actually made for you... so go buy it for you or one you love... or else
where have the times?
Transformers 20th anniversary optimus prime This stunning robot beast celebrates the 2nd decade of America's favorite toy and cartoon, transformers. With his awsome abilities, Optimus Prime likes to fight the evil transformers, and isn't afraid to turn into a truck OR a tank to get the job done. 75 dollars is amazingly reasonable...
Today is the first day of December, marking the start of the Christmas season. Experts in the presents department of the website have compiled a list of all the hot items this year, and i'm proud to introduce all 24 one day at a time...
Salute your shorts Complete series on DVD- salute your shorts was a live-action TV show on Nickelodean well before its sponge-bob days.... buy this incredibly awsome DVD today to see the TV show that defines what Nick is all about today!
not quite the rainbow connection but its a pretty stupid connection none the less...
click here to see what happens when your bored, its late at night, and your motor skills feel a bit impared...
click here to see what works
it may just be me... but the "game" this image advertises is the coolest, most fun damn thing I've ever seen
yet ANOTHER image from I_eat_metroids... thank you man! OR ELSE
click here to see more hatin' then a pistons-pacers game
click on this exciting, high-tech "hyper link" to see the beginnings of a new hoby for me... acsii art!
I DID UPDATE... so click here for some ballooning seltzer
DAY BEFORE THANKSGIVING! Well, only update today is that yesterday's update link was broken, so check it out now...
mercy my there's a snake in my boots.. brought to you by I_Eat_metroids... thank you for preventing me from making an update!
here is a USSRTOKEN. I hope you enjoy it... phew. That being said and done, go here for what has got to be the coolest website i've seen in a while...
loomp de doomp... an image requested for by the much hated silverjfx of GNF...
this image is more controversial then anything on Monday Night Football
click here to feel down on your luck.... also note new textbgs...
Betamax NON-Facturd: Betamax has been crediting for colapsing communism
I choose, you choose, we all choose IT
Betamax Facturd: The tape in Betamax was only 13 milimeters big.
and thus begins a new technique to make my already easy updating job even easier, for today I start the first of hopefully several "themed-weeks" where the diverse things I Make will all have a common theme that either stands out or is subtly hidden in the background. The theme this week? Betamax, the failed Sony competetor of the VHS... so here's...a weird distorted picture of the tiny casette
Betamax Facturd: Betamax wasn't officially cut by Sony until 2002
More evil then satan, google, and MSN and terrible news from the home front
click here to see a group that would make Mr. ol' Bill Cosby angry
This certainly was not a victory for the middle class
Since I had no update today, I did what I do best... make one up really fast, so I made the new lukerpig.com color scheme on the top left to help celebreate vetrans day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111ONE
and that's just the tip of the iceberg! If Pinnochio were real, he'd be this profession No content update today, but I resized the table (and thanks to my terrible thinking, made the task take about 30 refreshes too long)... CLICK ANYWHERE HERE TO SEE THE OFFICIAL LUKERPIG.COM GEOCITIES-ESQUE WEBSITE
Have you ever been sitting on your computer, minding your own business, when WHAM!!!! You remember you need to get your Uncle Zweible a Christmas Present? Well Fret no more, go HERE!
MOOSE ASSUME that that image will be the best one in 24 hours
POP-ART MOVEMENT.... dukakis in a tank
Listen to the sights and sounds of a traveling banshee
Lukerpig.com... The number one trusted name in elections
October was the best month yet for lukerpig.com. over 6,000 visitors marks an all-time high, and every month has outdone the last by hundreds, if not thousands. The cause for this surge was thanks to a blog site that seemingly is oriented for people that listen to rap, as one user kept on posting the picture I made of George W. Bush flipping the bird. I found that rather interesting... And speaking of Bush... Get ready for a while week of the US presidential election here... so check out the Hull Zoo for a donkey or elephant
Today starts a very important week, where the fate of my bilingual quips will be adored by millions
This fall will be seeing alot of important movie releases, especially around thanksgiving time. But there is one movie, released october 15, which will definatly prove to be more groundbreaking, revolutionary, and all around fun then all the others combined
I added a few more scgified images... and i decided to link to their origional sources just because of an "incident"
See the main man bein' da main man
being the creative person I am... I made a new section that is filled with GameXtreme games, the coolest system on earth
Hey everyone, Jonas here, and after a weekend of vacation, I decided I couldn't care less about anyone else and so I didn't update... and durring that time, I learned that the stenci didn't work, and now that thats over, i'll make up for 3 days of updatelessness with a complete and random babble about whever I talk about. On Friday I was trying very hard not to hold in my laughter because it is the best medicine, but all my laugh juice was gone, away like a baby in a farting pony, so I placed a large hand on my small hand and vigorously shouted "SHUT UP"............ the end :-) :-P :-D :-'(
Just in time for halloween: LUKERPIG.COM PUMPKIN STENCILS!
BOO scarier then a ghost....
D00D I hate pokeman or poketmon or napster or however you call it
NY Times endorse Kerry, Fox News probably endorses Bush.... see who lukerpig.com endorses
click here for operation shock and awe
this man saved Alex Trebek's life!
Be Sure to check out that link, which sends you an exciting exhibit where the world turns into a dynochromatic dream-world of pain and hunger... the scgified section. Tons, over 5, new images have joined it
Again, TCN made something so I don't have to...
!!!It may seem like a dormant hedgehog, but it Isn't a dormant hedgehog, so shut up
laugh at Kerry and Edward's relationship or laugh at George w. bush giving you the finger
here's the biggest waste of time you'll ever throw away
It's that time of year again, that time of year where I use my pathetic wits to tell you about other website's error pages!
CLICK there to see what is good for the heart and soul
ITS GONNA BLOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
not much yet on the front, but I have added some more annoying text backgrounds
click here if your a stoned slacker
...well, what do you know? it turns out I put the wrong index file for about 3 days on the site.... oh well, no ones loss... since I enjoyed the relative ease of Reggies immune system
click here to see how many I have kicked and "taked"
as I was digging around my old folders, some archaeologist found this!...also bigger text
after digging around, I found some of my "old school" lukerpig updates from before the domain name... I put them up on a special page showing off my "old school" layout... it's here!
If you like food TV then you like him TV.... Also, if you dance in the night and yell bloody Mary she magically appears!
surprise! after a few minuscule changes, lukerpig.com's minimum size went from 780px wide to 661px wide... and now it takes up more screen for bigger resolution. And I also removed the black line to increase maximum something "coolity".... and BOO
click here to see who is being compared to Nixon by desperate, and somewhat dim-witted, critics
BREAKING NEWS BULLITAN
OMmorpG!!!!!!!IT APPEARS THAT INTERNET BUTLER JEEVES HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED! Yes, my friends, kid napped. Ask.com is frantically trying to find him, and have decided to remove him image from the web until he comes back to his job... or not. To honor his loss, lukerpig.com has taken a break from updating today as a moment of silence...click here to see what box is the biggest this year
I have done several things to make the page load faster. since the backgrounds take a while to load, i finally got the right-of-mind to put a black background behind it, making the text immediately available when the page loads, and then the image background will come up faster. I know that since the text is white it is hard to see on the white background before the background loaded, this won't be a problem anymore.
Also, now, not all updates are on the same page, i have an archive with every update. This will make the page load faster and cut down the bandwidth for me (a lot of kilobytes for lukerpig.com went to my hulking index page), so now it is better.
fired up ol' anvil studios so that it would spit me out yet another beautiful lukerpig midi... and i got one...
click here to see how PPH made his money last week...
click here to see who sucked on Monday Night Football
thank's to my neighbor, i found out my dragon link didn't work. so for the 2nd day, I've been spared having to update! ITS A DRAGON!
I don't want to update so here's more Pikmin in SSBM! I took them last night, and I didn't use action replay! soon, I'll explain the trick to getting pikmin in SSBM!
click There to see a picture from the oldest NBA team in existence...
click there to see what smells fishy, yet tastes funny
To celebrate the (American) NFL, I present the lukerpig play, where, if you squint at it long enough, will resemble a face... but what? a pumpkin? Chewbacca? You decide
WOW! PIKMIN IN SSBM??? It's true! he's so secret, that he had only 1 trophy, no items, no moves, no damage counter, or poses other then the one he's laying in
Click here to see some beautiful "man-ip-u-lation" by me, the man with a gold fro
Well, I am kind of a few months late, but evildragon gave me this last may or so... and, while scanning my computer for something quick and easy to put up, i found it... so thank you evil........??!!!fsd
other stuff... also, added MORE ranbans and linktops
this is the weirdest smile I've come across in a while...
ITS THE 4 OF 04! and do you know what that means? PPH as your favorite profession!
GOOD NEWS! The spy convention has come to central NC, and when I went there yesterday, i got a recording of this testing out a new, cool voice recording technology.
IF YOU LIKE TO destroy things, or like destructive things. you like hurricanes. If you like slow things, you'll like what the hurricane is spelling
WHY NOT START OFF SEPTEMBER WITH A NEW LAYOUT? <- over there is a classic lukerpig.com update that I added exactly one year ago! the new layout was made by some dark-fetus-patrix thing, and it sucked. links were on both sides of the text. when will mankind ever learn? I hope that you enjoyed this day in lukerpig.com history
Haven't done too much with content, but I've spent time on loading speeds, and cut down the loading times here by about 25%... expect something tomorrow...
I like the mustache on my main man! Plus, i actually listened to a visitor (instead of do the opposite of what they ask), and removed google and marquee to squish it up, bro
sorry I haven't been updating much... school is getting busy
Well, you better as well thank me. I updated a section that is one of my favorites, yet I never update it. It's the page where I talk about other sites error pages! do you think that sounds fun? even if you don't' it is, trust me.
click here to see who rules...
DARK FETUS REMIX: CONGO MAYHEM #2
BRETT HULL would rather not know you, little boy
there may be a slight chance you can navigate around easier with little images next to the button! it'll help me! it'll help you! it's good for America, New Zeland, even Japan!
major update
i am not a predator
all this hurricane is making me hungry
lazy me skipped last week. well, check out the awesome.... REMIX DARK FETUS REMIX: CONGO MAYHEM #1
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMGIT'S NOT AMAZING
... and it is too small
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMGIT'SASMAZING!
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMGread a book
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG RIP
OMG OMG OMG I NEED A HUG.
OMG ITS A CONSPARICY ????!!..>SDf;lJ;lkj
more lifical philosophical
GIGTANTICOUS Wide World of PPH update! 6 is a lot omg omg
click here to see your favorite living politician that hasn't, amazingly, died yet
he saved your life
about 1 year Ago, I got anvil studios, and the "my midi's" section was made... to celebrate heres... BIRTHDAY!
this is clearly a dilemma............................. also, lets all welcome knowislam for joining the lukerpig affiliate family...
what's black and white and RED ALL OVER??????!!!! and i just noticed that last week's Remix was never put up! LOL THATS FUNNY
so click there to see it... and i wont post a new one ''caus you'll hear this one...
click here to see the future of lukerpig.com
DARK FETUS REMIX: DIAL UP #2
Dark Fetus Remix #2
as you can see, I'm not in Japan now...
as you see, the site is a BIT more scrunched up and the google thing looks a BIT better... and that took me all day, so I wasn't there. And since I'm lazy today, i won't make a beautiful paint image or classical midi, but a winning ticket to help america and it's corrupt 2 party system thing... I also just put up the link to PPH career day! click to see PPH doing your favorite career and actually getting enough pay to feed a family of 4 and Ethiopia, while you, with the same career, would get chicken feed! yay!
biggest update yet of bad jpgs! I hope you also enjoy the annoying google search bar! just a little something extra to make this site look like a bomb tore through it :) :( :} :$ :? :3 :0 :'( >:( WHEN WILL THE MADNESS END!
click here to see the series about a series of unfortunate timing and a terrible throat ache.
don't get lost in the RAIN! get it?... of course you don't its an inside joke i have with myself and myself only
well, 'im back from national don't update lukerpig.com week... it went by fast... anyway... I'm adding something new... you see, i know a guy that knows a guy that knows the previous guy that knows himself... he calls himself dark fetus... and it appears he can make adequate music, so he remixed some midi's of mine... I plan to release one a week... so click the ugly baby below to get the first one
DARK FETUS REMIX: DIAL UP #1
I am sorry I have been unable to update... I'm celebrating "national don't update lukerpig.com week" and I just wanted to tell you that...
I'm BACK..... I WAS BACK BUT NOW I'm BACK UPDATING! so, I don't have any new content ''caus I'm lazy. but enjoy the thing right above this that currently says "lukerpig.com is richard scarry's best website ever"... soon it'll be a news real...
i may be gone for a week, so click there to get your week's worth of material
even MORE linktops and ranbans... and this is like homestarrunner... but not better
click ->
... and some soiled pants from evil venom dragon. and click there to listen to some old-school lukerpig midiness
OMG two for one paint update! spoiled brats. As you may notice, i'm putting less thought into lukerpig.com because i dont want to spend time working on it, so enjoy new rans and bans i put up.!..!
in a time of tyranny and stupid decisions, one man,tom, is thinking outside his own gender to help people of the other gender, women.
I have five golden somethings...
click here for a thing about my life
did you smell that?
heres a song dedicated the last man EVER to succeed in taking out his own tongue and giving it to the cheese factory... I also hope you like the new linktops, bans, and rans i've put up for you...
who says Italian Chicks aren't part of the world scheme to take your clothes off your back and sell it to poor, hungry mutants living in cellars, anyway?
this guy has no sense of direction and wonderment. does he make you cry, too?
in a world of 3d glasses, I challenge the monotany of red and blue... and I also want to make a contribution to the best game ever. and don't forget to visit my favorite movie ever!
have you ever sat around and wondered why felt feels so good?... also, click here to listen to some Ray Charles music...
click here to witness a miracle of the inudstrial revolution
CLICK HERE AND YOU'LL SEE JUST HOW BEAUTIFUL LIFE IS
I am not monica. and, hooray! more nostradomus quatrains!
happy birthday mr.mitchell
click here to honor the last person the world needed to die durring D-day weakend...
wow... I'm back! so go here and rejoice to the 2 new chapters of First Grade STORY!!!
in a world of no-tests and no-homework, one certain lukerpig can't update their website once a day any more...
more demented venomdragon contribution thingys ...II..MM...OOO???...
ARE YOU PROJECT? ARE YOU COOL? ok then... and.. um... the same kid gave me a midi of sorts...
click here to see wise words about life and the world we live in... and click here if you want to see a picture of George W. Bush, america's 43rd president, sticking out his middle finger...
check out more fan related goodness!?!
i'm back from wherever I was.. so go here and i hope you get what your asking for
even more paint images... hopefully the more I put the sicker you get... I could be adding other things, you know
WELCOME BACKhome where the buffaloe roam.......
fresh from E3, its PRESS A KEY AND WIN! and click here to find exclusive shots of teh Nintendo DS
click here to see/hear what internet site(s) is/are sweeping the nation(s)
click here to see the latest thing i added
click here to be testified by the 9/11 commission
click here to learn about the dangers of destroying people's favorite passion... and click HERE to see lukerpig's work of pure art
tada its me!... and you know what else? not only did I update first grade story, I chapterified them, too... PLUS, I hope you like the SCG mouse and scroll bar, caus if you don't you shall suffer
mark your calendars because I did something I haven't done in a long time, and because I'm.... SECOND TO NONE!
clickhere to see who will win the kentucky derby today
thrift... and click here to see america's favorite moment when Spears and, um... Donna, or whatever her last name is, "embrace"
meh... if you really care, the nostradomus thing is updated daily... now i dont ever have to link to it again in my updates.. hahaha
Check out the new section... Nostradomus's lesser known quatrains. Also, click here to learn about the craziness of Eli Manning durring the NFL draft
folk lore and lots to sing with at the dance
random fact of the day: Dr. Mike Howard of the University of Stanford, is the only person known alive to open a package made by nintendo without scizors.
click here to see why I am depressed
...Is it just me, or does john kerry appear more on georgewbush.com appear more then johnkerry.com...
here is your monday first grade story update and here is an icecream cone for the young one
Donald Trump should have hired me on his TV show
simle complaints... the song... heart juice...the song... and.... MORE FIRST GRADE STORY!!!
I've added more backgrounds, banners, and link tops... and click here for a new brett hull and a new brett hull wanna be.... PLUS! 2 new midis... albert and scraps...
Check out more random backgrounds and stuff... and look! an update!
...screwing with layouts again... heres a lighter one...
click here to see an random display of badly compressed jpgs
happy saint patricks day, wee laddy
check out what PPH has been doing these last 6 busy months here
click here to see exactly is making me wonder, "WTF"
well, celebrating my depressing new layout... scientists across the world rejoiced at the addition of 6 new brett hull specimens ... and, people are listening to my new single.... SKILL!
wow... this is my first layout I ever made... and thats why it sucks. thats all i have to say about that...
yay! its march! Anyways, five years ago, the columbine shootings happened. It turns out one of the shooters left threats to other students on his website.... which give me an idea...
also, don't forget about 2 new species in the brett hull zoo!
listen to something better than ordinary... reigns
its valentines day... the best football games always happen today... so check out my creepy new section, scans
are you happy? are you hungry for breakfast? kellog's and bliss!
ol' faithful anvil studios has coughed up yet anouther midi... prepare to be "blinded!
I added TWO WHOLE MIDIS! oh... and i also added a new animal to the BRETT HULL ZOO!
There are rumors that Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake's half time boob stunt is the most searched event ever on the internet, so I decided to state this and hope people find this site and click on the link in a search engine, genious, aren't I?
You know what a good site is? I think Sarbar.com is. One of my best friends own it, and he even bought the domain for me for my birthday.He is planning to have his site kinda like this but more, oh I dont know, Sucky. Not that it will be bad, but there will never be enough content to keep you entertained for longer then 5 minues. Oh well at least he want's to capture the sprit. The spirt of randomness. I think he will use a lukerball. GO LUKERBALL, Catch that randomness!
click here and see the grand opening of the BRETT HULL ZOO!
now most pages share the same layout... amazingly, this is the first time my site had a layout! ok...
Q:where have I been? A: DOING BETTER THINGS... atkins diet... also, check out FUN GAME!!! AND! i've also added more to my error page commentary page
2004... THAT MEANS THAT 2004 YEARS AGO IT WAS 0! WOOHOO!
click here to see First Grade Story, translated from korean and back... if you dare
SADDAM, MUCH LIKE BUGS BUNNY, HAS BEEN CAUGHT IN A HOLE AFTER DECEIVING HIS ENEMIES FOR YEARS...
introducing, the Lukerpig.com Celebrity Chatroom!here!
added even 2 more songs to the weird place with all that music
added 3 more songs to the midi section and updated first grade story
I added on to wax and added one day...
Added 2 more songs to my midi's section...
6 songs to my midis section. 5 are on top, but falling dream is on the bottom... also, I updated the first grade story!
I added sensativity to my stupid songs section
I updated the First Grade Story so you might as well check it out...
ahhh... My ftp still isn't showing up... BUT! I can still put things in my FTP! if your not a nerd... don't worry... so, check out my new midi, twine...
added some pictures to my odd paint pictures gallery
added tons of translations to odd translations
added a roller coaster to the scgified objects
click here to see the official lukerpig video... DISTRACTIONS!
woohoo, i added 6 songs to the midis section! listen with your heart, not your brians!
WHY NOT START OFF SEPTEMBER WITH A NEW LAYOUT?
click here to see real pictures of PPH in movies!! wahoo...
today, i added a few mario reviews to the reviews you will need section.
phew... big day for the site... first. I got yet another fan sending in pictures of SCGish images! click here to see them. also, i figured out game maker, so click here to expierence the lukerpig gamer challenge (?)
I FINALLY GET WHAT THEY MEAN BY "GOOGLE SEARCH!". anyway... added a camera to the scgified objects
added tons more songs to my site. but, dont worry. i'mnot completely lifeless... i am just fast at making top-lukerpig-quality music
added songs to my website... listen here to listen to MY midis...
wow... got my worlds first fan contributation... who is a real big fan of the site (i feel so honored) witness history of the my worlds first fan contribute here!
god... its been a while, hasn't it? well, don't worry! i finally added a new gallary! it's looking like there will be quite a few more soon! so, please, come back... I'M BEGGING YOU.
god, we folks down here in NC are having an extremely hot and dry summer! anyways, i hope you enjoy the new mouse cursor i made! it took along time to add it to all 80, yes 80 pages of my website...
my new favorite band... SUN CITY GIRLS... they call themselves the SCG for short...
added hockey pads to SCGIFIED OBJECTS.
added a E-Reader, Gameboy Player new GBA SP to my scgified objects section.
Check out my new error page... click here
Check out my new BLOG entery...
Transferred to a new layout, nothing really important missing I dont think....
Whats the point of updating? no one sees this anyway? oh well...
Thats right, fool, i got a domain name
You may be seeing a lot of advancements in my site! movies, DHTML codes I found...
Hahaahah! I got my own SCG!! store!!!!
Cool, I learned how to make people not take stuff from my website, and how to name my pictures!!!
YAY!!! IM THE 10,000 PERSON TO MY WEBSITE, 3 TIMES IN A ROW!!!
Watched Goldmember today. Good movie. "Hey everybody! Im from holand!! isn't that great!" I also liked the Harry Potter spoof.
Oh my Good Jesus, no update in oh... 7 WHOLE DAYS. AM I OUT OF MY MIND????? NOOOOOO. I JUST HAVE BETTER THINGS TO DO. OK???? GET OFF MY CASE.
Well,everything is done, so now I can embelish, or however you spell it.
Lookin good. (Not really, me an optimist)
Even though I know that no one goes to my site, I still feel official when I add to my updates section. Yup...
Well, I'm having trouble with the Pointless Gallery.
Today I have started the weird facts page and promothing physical health page.
Well, SOMEONE hurt my hand yesterday!! But dont worry, I will probably not die. (P.S. This is the first HTML code thingie. Patrix has been doing this site and showing me HTML!!
I'm on the internet! Yay...